1. Elton John on “The Muppet Show” (1977)
In what’s gotta be the most delightful three minutes to ever take place on Earth, a very stylish Elton John and Miss Piggy sing duet on “Don’t Go Breakin’ My Heart.” He may be the only guest to ever wear more pink and sequins than she does.
2. Biz Markie on “Yo! Gabba Gabba” (2010)
In which Biz Markie recommends that children punch themselves in the throat repeatedly.
3. The New Standards on “The Choo Choo Bob Show” (2012)
This is seriously like a real-life version of that SNL sketch where Fred Armisen and Kristen Wiig are a terrible holiday music duo who make weird vocalizations instead of singing. Thank you, Minnesota public access.
4. R.E.M. on “Sesame Street” (2010)
FURRY HAPPY MONSTERS FEELING GLAD. Can you even deal with this new rendition of the classic R.E.M single, partially sung by puppet pals?
5. Paul Simon on “Sesame Street” (1977)
There is absolutely no way to get through this clip of Paul Simon and a small pal singing “Me and Julio Down by the Schoolyard” without shedding at least one tear at the beauty of the world. Amazing, even if he does interrupt her a little.
6. The Spice Girls on “All That” (1997)
Wanna see the Spice Girls define the second law of thermodynamics? Don’t even play like you didn’t just click on this video so hard that you broke a nail.
7. The Backstreet Boys on “Arthur” (2002)
Here are the Backstreet Boys DOING “REGGAE” VOICES in their cover of the ARTHUR THEME SONG. Magnificent, ridiculous, horrible, perfect.
8. Angina on an unidentified Russian boob show for kids (2006)
Please make sure to tear your eyes away from the obvious and also watch the disgruntled child in a blue sequined hat prance angrily around in a halter top. There’s so much wrong happening here.
9. Mario Cantone as Sammy Davis, Jr. on “Steampipe Alley” (1988)
Um, so Charlotte’s best friend Anthony from Sex and the City had his own New York City children’s show in the ’80s and it’s really bizarre. Check out this incredibly fucked-up segment in which he pretends to be Sammy Davis, Jr. and makes a little girl search for his missing eye in a dish of stuffing. With her mouth. #what #davidlynch
10. Alice Cooper on “The Muppet Show” (1978)
Once upon a time in the ’70s, Alice Cooper emerged from a coffin, freaked out in a silken cape, and summoned ghosts during a live performance. Totally normal for him, except that this happened, inexplicably, on a children’s show about puppets.
11. Johnny Cash on “Sesame Street” (1974)
Here’s Johnny Cash singing a very special song for Oscar the Grouch, who in turn refers to him as “Johnny Trash.” So good.
12. Katy Perry on “Sesame Street” (2010)
This online-only clip of Katy Perry never made it to air because Elmo’s super low-cut costume outraged parents or something. Anyway, I think that was why?
13. Hanson on “The Weird Al Show” (1996)
Hanson meets Harvey, the world’s biggest hamster, and also sings a little in this totally normal and not intensely weird at all guest appearance.
14. Aaliyah on “All That” (1997)
Here’s Aaliyah both performing and being “One in a Million.”
15. Cyndi Lauper on “The Super Mario Bros. Super Show!” (1989)
Starting at 4:44, Cyndi Lauper goes on a hunt for Captain Lou Albano, who has gone missing, with help from Mario and Luigi. Most ’80s thing ever alert.
16. Sonny and Cher on “The New Scooby-Doo Movies” (1972)
In this hour-long TV special, an animated Sonny and Cher hang with Scoob and the gang in a crumbling bat-infested manor.